Today I’m interviewing Damon Suede, author, scoundrel, and man-about-kilt. Because Damon never does anything half-assed (witness pic to left), it’s a very long interview.
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Tell us about this award you’re up for and how and why we can/should support you.
Goodreads selected my first novel, Hot Head, as one of fifteen candidates for Best Romance of 2011. It’s the only gay romance on the list and it’s up against books by Nora Roberts, Sherrilyn Kenyon, and JR Ward. The funny thing is, I had no clue what had happened for about half a day…
On Tuesday I got home from teaching a class and I had 121 emails in my inbox. It took me a while to figure out what had gone down while I was out living my life in the world. Somehow, a contemporary M/M about love and porn in the FDNY managed to place favorably against all those New York Times bestsellers, which knocked me sideways. Actually as another writer pointed out to me, it is the only book on the list written by a guy and one of the two not released by a mainstream New York publisher. So I am literally beside myself with gratitude and happiness. Since GayRomLit I’ve been thinking a whole lot about the ways our genre can move towards mainstream readers, so the attention felt like a wacky shift in the wind and a thumbsup from the universe.
If anyone feels like supporting Hot Head in specific and Gay Romance in general by giving their vote I’d be deeply grateful. The poll is here:
http://www.goodreads.com/award/choice/#56042-Best-Romance
Now for the fun questions: Favorite place you’ve ever traveled?
Prague. I lived in London for several years, so I don’t think I can count it as a vacation destination anymore. Otherwise I would’ve said London. Prague has the seductive, serpentine quality that seems endlessly fascinating and varied. Amazing history, astonishing artistic ecology, beautiful people, delicious food, jaw-dropping architecture and landscapes. It’s simultaneously a loud city and a taciturn city, a fleshpot and a stodgy bookworm, a modern bohemian hotspot and a sinuous occult linchpin of the Old World. Everything to recommend it. When my boyfriend and I were in Tuscany this summer, living in a 12th century castle for a week… we had this crazy glammy-pants getaway and the whole time we kept having to compare it to Prague because of its contradictions. Tuscany is gorgeous, but Prague is magical. And in a way I love being there so much that if you handed me a ticket right now I’d be on a plane in 2 hours. I’d find a way to make it work. I have the same bone-deep love of London because it always feels like home when I touch down, but Praha is probably my favorite vacation spot.
Favorite foods and most hated foods?
Indian is my favorite cuisine. I probably picked that up living in London. Even New York doesn’t have ANYWHERE near the level of Indian food that the UK does. I could easily eat Indian food every meal, every day, for the rest of my life and die happy. I love the variety and the spice and the heartiness of it. My family is Arabic so there’s probably some of that at work in my taste buds: a love of strong flavors and hearty proteins, but Indian will always be my go-to meal. In general Asian food comprises about 80% of my diet: Indian, Thai, Korean, Vietnamese, Japanese… etc.
Hmmmm, most hated food is way harder. I’m kind of a garbage disposal in that I can find something to love on almost any menu. Old sushi would make that list. Fresh sushi is divoon, but when the fish starts to turn and the rice gets gummy there’s nothing worse than the low-tide, call-the-hospital flavor. Vegetarian cooking needs to be exceptional for me to get enthusiastic because I was raised on red meat and butter. Now, I actually love tofu and lentils and the other pretend-you-aren’t-an-omnivore options, but to prepare beautiful vegetarian you have to be bad-ass in the kitchen.
Book/TV show/movie that changed your life and why
Well, a lot of books have changed my life but since I’ve been thinking about her a LOTtoday I’m gonna say Madeleine L’Engle’s A Ring of Endless Light because it was the first novel that showed me how deeply a story could affect a reader’s emotional state. It’s also one of the first “romances” I ever read, and looking back now I realize that it is exactly that: a YA romance with paranormal elements. I will never forget the experience of reading the final chapters and crying so hard that I couldn’t see the pages, so fiercely that I had to set the book down and just weep at one point because the feelings were that intense. I remember at 9 thinking, “THIS is what a story can do.” It pulled me inside out. I’d grown up in showbusiness, so I knew all about audiences getting passionate with live theatre, but to experience that kind of emotional tsunami… devastating, eye-popping, life-changing.
About a year later the snotty prep school I attended, wound up hosting L’Engle on an extended visit and the librarians, knowing my obsession with her, assigned me to her for a WEEK as a kind of docent. I almost died of joy. For five glorious days, I was excused from classes and literally accompanied her to all her appearances throughout the school: lunches with the board, speeches to the kindergarten, readings for classes. I was probably ten years old and very shy still. She was a MIRACLE. Madeleine sort of enveloped me immediately and created private jokes with me and laughed with me and whispered to me when the grownups were being stodgy or narrow. At the end of the week, with me sitting in the front row in an audience of 800 little bourgeois robots, she got up and gave a speech entitled “The Freedom to Fuck Up” which created quite a stir I can tell you… She urged all of the children in the room to take startling risks and TRY to fail so that their successes would be more dazzling. The day she left, she gave me hardcovers of all her books (which I still own) and signed them too me (which made a tremendous impression on me). That copy of Ring of Endless Light is one of my most treasured possessions. My whole life my mother had nurtured courage and audacity in me, but my shyness had kept it hidden. That L’Engle week tore a locked door off its hinges for me.
Years later I learned about her close personal friendships with many wacky gay artists and now I wonder if when we met that first Monday, Madeleine saw the little gay boy in me struggling to draw breath in that horrible Republican enclave. She urged me to write and to dream and to live out loud…and I listened. Almost a decade later, I came to school in New York and wrote her a long letter, thanking her for everything she did that week, all the windows and latches she yanked open, and she wrote back, warm as ever, generous as the sun. Afterwards, every so often I sent little updates letting her know I was still trying to fuck up often and well.
What an unbelievable brilliant light she was on the earth. We are poorer for her passing.
You’ve been given the key to the TARDIS and she’s decided she wants to let you drive. Where do you go/what do you do?
I travel to the day after my death, to my own house, and I read and watch all the things I’ve written and directed in my life WITHOUT having had to sit down and write them first! THAT would be heaven to me, to read and watch my own work without having to endure the process of creation, revision, and production… then when I’d finished I’d kiss my widower goodbye and come back so I could do it properly knowing the reward before I started. A rare gift, that: to know the target before you shoot.
You have a weekend turn unexpectedly free and you have by some miracle nothing pressing to quick go finish instead. How do you spend your 48 hours?
Nice! Well, I spend Saturday morning writing, because I ALWAYS have things I should be writing and not writing feels so goddamn weird and unsettling. I stop both days for lunch with my boyfriend and then we nap, read, fuck, watch old movies on the couch until dark in whatever order seems best. Saturday night I drag him out twostepping because there’s nothing better in the world on a Saturday night. Sunday morning I call a bunch of friends and put together a last minute brunch. Walk back from that and spend the afternoon doing some fix-it project around the house because my boyfriend loves building and fiddling with practical things and I rarely have time to participate. And then Sunday night we go out for Indian and maybe a wander through Strand Books. 
Home for food coma, and wake up Monday feeling like a homo sapien sapien sapien with all the time in the world ad nothing to lose.
Cats or dogs?
CATS.
Well I like dogs too, big ones mostly. I grew up with bouviers and borzois and pit bulls and great danes, so I like a dog that has some heft. Actually I love all animals for the most part, lizards, snakes, rats. My mom represented an exotic pet store when I was a kid and my family had a ranch, so we had some weird-ass pets growing up.
But my animal of choice is no question cats. Cats have always loved me, and though I was “allergic” when I was little I loved them so much that by the time I was 11 or so, my allergies just…vanished. (?!) I like how independent and strange and quick they are. Cats fit me, definitely, and I sort of understand them better, although I think dogs are wonderful. With cats I feel like I communicate directly with them and we understand one another. I haven’t met more than 2 or 3 cats in my life that didn’t love me instantly and vice versa. LOL
Chocolate: your feelings on it.
Ummm. It’s a food group. How can I have feelings about a food group? That’s like asking me about my feelings on air.
I love chocolate and tend to be a bit of a snob about it. I like BITTER chocolate and natural as possible. And when possible I drink raw, unsweetened chocolate, thick and spicy out of steaming bowls. I like the chocolate to bite back a little and to be so dense that it has a smoky, furry feel in my mouth. The best “candy” I’ve ever had was in Belgium, where the chocolate is made daily like bread. And yet Godiva, which is touted as being delicious and “Belgian” tastes like scented wax. Give me the real thing any day! There’s a chocolatier in Brooklyn named Jacques Torres who makes REAL drinking chocolate in the winter, a bubbling Willy Wonka lagoon-sized urn that he peppers; I love walking over on a cold morning for a bowl. Delish!
You find a build-a-man/woman machine. Assuming the ethics of it wash out or that this is in a dream and nothing matters, what do you do next?
I create a clone of myself so I can get more work done without feeling like I’m being a lazy asshole and avoiding other things I need to be doing. Then I create a clone of my boyfriend so that my clone work-self doesn’t go insane or lapse into depression. Then I build clones of all our friends and family so that the happy couple are surrounded by the people they love.
And then I realize that I’ve just imagined and created a perfect argument for Candide’s best-of-all-possible-worlds thesis and hop back in the aforementioned Tardis and undo the creation of all those unnecessary redundant people so that I can get back to living this amazing life I’ve been given. I wouldn’t trade places with anybody, not even myself. LOL
What’s the question you wish I’d have asked?
“Hey Damon, what are we gonna be doing when Marie and I come to visit New York next month?”
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Damon Suede grew up out-n-proud deep in the anus of right-wing America, and escaped as soon as it was legal. Though new to M/M, Damon has been writing for print, stage, and screen for two decades. He’s won some awards, but counts his blessings more often: his amazing friends, his demented family, his beautiful husband, his loyal fans, and his silly, stern, seductive Muse who keeps whispering in his ear, year after year. Get in touch with him at:
Heidi Cullinan
Evaine
Marie Sexton
Shawny
I’m glad I’m not the only one who doesn’t think that Godiva is the greatest. (I like Lindt dark truffles most.)
The L’Engle story was wonderful. Thank you for sharing it! =)
Great interview guys. I had the great pleasure to live in Prague for 16 months years ago, just after the Velvet Revolution. It’s as wonderful to live there as to visit. Bratislava is cute too, kind of a tiny Prague. Nothing beats the main Prague square at Christmas with the market and the snow and huge trees. Sigh. Now I’m kind of homesick and it’s been 13 years.
However you won’t find much in the way of Indian food there, even now. But the Czech food is wonderful so it’s not a hardship.
Have a great weekend.
@Tam The first time I came to Prague was RIGHT after the Velvet Revoluton. Crazy, beautiful time. And yeah, the Asian food there isn’t the best, but there is some fantastic eating to be done if you can forego that! My bf and I used to gorge on Indian and Lebanese in London, so we wouldn’t miss it in Prague and Vienna. LOL
I am so interested in your comments about Prague as my husband and I are planning a trip to Europe this summer and Prague is on our possibilities list. It seems everyone who has ever been there loves it, but it not a very common destination. We are considering some sort of Prague/Vienna/Budapest combo.
I agree with your chocolate comments, although I must say I had a dark chocolate/almond/sea salt Godiva recently and it was divine. I am totally on a sweet/salty kick lately and have had too many salted caramel mochas at Starbucks.
Last thought, what is it with romance readers/writers and cats? We all seem to have them. Not sure why (other than our amazing taste in pets!)
Great interview!
You will LOVE it. Seriously. Prague is one of those places it’s almost impossible not to love. And you should definitely hit the trifecta if you have the time. They’re so close, and the train rides are lovely. (I’m a big train fan).
This is a delightful interview. I especially loved reading about Madeleine L’Engle, whose books–especially A Wrinkle in Time and your favorite, A Ring of Endless Light–were among my most beloved and re-read. Although not a religious person myself, I found her encompassing, and very humanistic, spirituality reached out and taught me a lot of important things about love and forgiveness and acceptance–of myself and of others.
I saw that Hot Head was nominated at Goodreads and voted for it right away. I loved that book with its fully realized characters and some of the most gorgeous language I have ever read in any genre. Good luck with that, and congratulations on the nomination.
Thank you so much! I think that her humanism is the thing that impressed me the most. As a little boy I didn’t have a word for it, but as I grew up and pursued my own studies in religion/philosophy I remember thinking, THAT’S what religion should give you…that kind of open generous spirit. She lived in such grace and gratitude. And it spills out of all her books.
I am so shocked to find out that Damon was shy!! lol I loved the interview and really like the fact that no matter how many you do and how many I read, I always find out something new about you. Oh and I also voted for you
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I loved this interview! Damon you’re so awesome, but my favorite part? Hearing your thoughts about chocolate. Hehehe.
You’re better than my best girl friend AND my DH all put together, just judging by this interview. My DH, while I love him, just doesn’t get the books thing, like at all (of the massive massive number of books in our house, less than a tenth of them are his.) And my best friend, however otherwise wonderful and amazing she is, does not get why I love Madeleine L’Engle so much (although she otherwise loves books verynearlyalmost as much as I do.)
The one thing I love unconditionally about being a military spouse is that in the fall the commissary imports some really spectacularly wonderful stuff from Europe. I stockpile chocolate so that I can eke it out over the course of the year because I would seriously rather have one piece of really amazing stuff once or twice a week than not-so-great stuff every day (this is probably also why I make brownies from scratch rather than a mix.) Which isn’t to say that on a really bad day, I won’t indulge in lesser chocolate, because sometimes even not-so-great chocolate is better than none at all.
Word! As needs must and all that… Even bad chocolate has its place in our diet. But nothing can beat that smoky, rich, full-bodied, furry taste of REAL I’m-suddenly-in-the-rainforest chocolate. LOL
When I was living in Europe that was one of the big bonuses: they are much pickier about sweets than Yanks. We just have a weird New World fixation on processed sugar. Burns the mouth, kills the flavor!
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Loved Hot Head. So very happy about you being nominated. I am headed over to vote right now. Youre so adorable.
Great interview
Congrats on Hot Head’s success Damon.
Oh, and I’m so stealing the chocolate is a food group line
First I have to have a TOTAL fangirl moment…*squees*
Damon, I LOVE your books!! I’m reading Grown Men right now & I can totally picture this tiny little outpost of a planetoid w/ 2 suns. Plus, your turn of phrase just makes me chuckle.
I already voted for you.
I, too, am a chocolate fan. My faves are Godiva, Lindt, & Dove (in that order), but I’ll take it pretty much any way I can get it…lol
That’s awesome! Grown Men was such a strange write for me…the worldbuilding and whatnot, so I’m glad it’s landing clearly in your mind’s eye. Why in the hell did one of my heroes need to be MUTE?! LOL The heart has reasons that reason knows nothing of!
Writing it taught me so much about empathy and projection in romance, though. Ox and Runt just wouldn’t let go of me till they’d told their story.
Great interview my fav chocolate is the cheap kind it’s yummy
Surprisingly well-written and infmrotaive for a free online article.
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Did I mention I just blogged the other day about how damned cute you are? And how squeezable your heiny is? Cuz, dayam!
Damon, I swear to God, every interview/blog/author page/what-the-hell-ever I read from you makes me like you more. I wanna be your straight-girl bff next door neighbor and just bask in the awesomeness that is you!
LOLOL Excellent! And I’m glad my butt and my blather don’t disappoint.
I just now went over and saw your awesome GRL page and literally laughed out loud. Fantastic. And I (and my bf) love the photos you used as well. The weekend was so crazy I would up with almost NO pics of my own so I’m super glad other folks were on the case!
There were so many great pic’s to choose from, too! I was camera impaired, so I didn’t get many myself (pouts), so thank God for generous attendees! I couldn’t believe how many people had shots of *me*! I’m anonymous, why would anyone want pic’s of me??? LOL
I’m starting to wonder if you ever sleep, Damon.
Love the Madeleine L’Engle story, Damon! She was one of the earliest authors I remember reading, and I’ve kept reading her stuff over and over again as an adult. Her stories transcend categories, and hearing you talk about what a wonderful person she was just confirms what I expected–that she was a true humanist of the first order. You were so lucky to have that time with her!
All-around terrific interview! Loved meeting and talking with you in NOLA! Best of luck with the Goodreads thing–I went straight over there and voted for you as soon as I heard about it!
I went and voted for Hot Head also! I remember for years my dad used to travel for business to Amsterdam and bring me back the best dark chocolate – YUM! I used to dole it out a small piece a day.
And thank you for signing a copy of Hot Head for me – my buddy Ive gave it to me this weekend. I will treasure it!
Ah Damon, the more I read about you, the more I adore you. Loved reading that story about Madeleine. I know that one day you will probably pay it forward (me me, can I follow you for a week? lol). It’s Nov 4th & Hot Head remains one of my fave books of 2011. It really took my breath away a few times and, as Courtney S says, your turn of phrase is just awesome. Good to know that Grown Men is like that too. Got to read it soon!!
@Damon I read your book and I honestly can swear to you, you managed just what you said you wanted, to create that emotional tsunami. I read it few weeks ago and shitload of books ago, yet I still remember every sigh, every flinch, when i so deeply relived feelings of your sweet characters. You made me shed tears of joy and frustration and sadness and i felt my heart break when you talked about the Twins. I also want to thank you for the wonderful interview, it makes me still want to shed a tear when i read about your love for Madeleine L’Engle’s A Ring of Endless Light.
You totally make me more determined to continue writing, to try to finish my first book, (I’ve only written fanfictions so far) and generally just make me love this genre more and more. It feels somehow right. As in this is the right direction for me and my writing XD. Even though I am scared and shy and all that.
I am charmed by your love for Prague, I am Slovak and lived in Bratislava all my life until recently, Visited Prague few times too. I know exactly how you feel.
Lastly, I want to thank you and all other amazing m/m authors out there (I wish one day I will be one of you), that even if it is not yet a common thing in the eyes of every person on Earth, you help to create places at least on internet, where loving a person in normal and natural and it doesn’t matter what he or she has under the clothes. I never understood how anyone could be so arrogant to actually believe that they can tell a person to feel some way and they would.
Love is the greatest gift, along with life, that humanity was given. A gift that can’t be controlled.
Thank you, sincerely..
Skylark, thank YOU for the sweet words and your passion for fiction that breaks rules and builds bridges. one of the greatest gifts of my crazy gay romance fiction adventure has been discovering the beautifulk community within the genre: fans, readers, pubslihers, journalists. Amazing. Such a testament to the importance of hope and affection in our real lives and the ways that romantic “fantasy” make a tremendous difference in the world.
Write hard, Little Skylark! Write hard and burn bright!
oh god, you made me actually cry with this reply,
Thanks so much.
I WILL! I WON’T GIVE UP!
Thanks-a-mundo for the post.Much thanks again. Want much more.