My daughter has been on horses since she was three and some friends of ours put her on the back of a Percheron (bareback). She was scared of flies, but she’d wander around these huge horses’ legs like she was in the safest place in the world, and she let Chip lead her around with nothing to hold onto but the horse’s mane. When we stopped going up to Minnesota every few months in 2007, she burst out crying about how much she missed riding horses, and it was the kind of cry that came from her soul. It got my attention, and I looked up “horse riding lessons in Ames.” I found her a barn, she started taking lessons, and she’s been at it ever since.
At first all we had to buy was boots, but then came johdpurs, then chaps, then a helmet of her own because she didn’t have one at a show, then a shirt and jacket so she could look sharp. We caught a break there for awhile when all we had to do was buy new pants and boots and recently a sweat-wicking shirt. We started leasing lesson horses last fall, and in January we started leasing a teacher’s former racehorse, and this month we did our first “free lease,” which isn’t free at all because we pay all board and vet fees for him now.
This week we found out the barn is foreclosed by the bank, and we have two weeks to get out. What I’ve learned about horse people is that they’re family to each other, and it’s been a hard, hard week at Canterbrooke. We’re going to a temporary home at a rather rudimentary barn (no viewing area. I have no idea what allergy-riddled me will do while Anna rides) until a new barn is finished that’s more our speed in November. Yesterday I dropped over $650 in tack, because we’ll need our own now (though I got a great deal on a Passier saddle she’ll use forever), and starting in November I have to come up with full board at a rather posh stable that’s a bit of a drive away. I’m thinking of printing new business cards: please buy my books so I can support my child’s horse habit.
A lot of people wonder why I do it, because it truly is right at the edge of what we can afford. They figure Anna could just go do something else. It’s true, she could. What they don’t know is how much working with a horse heals my anxiety-riddled daughter. She who can barely stay overnight at a friend’s house is out at the barn right now cleaning and organizing her tack with almost nobody there (though that probably changed since I dropped her off). She’s been bucked off horses and gotten back on, but you can’t get her on a roller coaster. I can’t get her to bring her dirty dishes to the kitchen without melting down in frustration, or hang up her towel, or empty her lunchbox, but she cleans up not just her horse’s messes and the stable’s tack but cleans up after other people who thought their mother was coming by later. With horses, my baby thrives.
Hopefully with the next few royalty checks I can buy my baby’s baby outright so that he will be hers alone. I gave up my cleaning service and Starbucks and some of my book budget for board, and that horse tack is what was going to be extra swag for GayRomLit. I sit in that barn for hours and hours even though it makes me sick because of all the allergens.
Look at this picture below and tell me it’s not worth it.
Heidi Cullinan
Evaine
Marie Sexton
Shawny
I totally get this, and think it’s awesome. My son had hippotherapy for about six months and loved every minute of being on horseback. I would love to get him in riding lessons, but as you’ve stated, it’s expensive. So, instead, he’s participating in his other love – music. He’s in his first year of band as a sixth grader and playing the baritone. He wanted to play tuba. At least the baritone is one of the instruments provided by the school and I didn’t have to come up with rental fees.
I’m so happy for your family that your daughter’s found something she loves like this! Keep on riding
Totally worth. But as a mom of a kid who has struggles you go through a lot to find that the things that makes them feel good about life.
I think it’s wonderful that your helping your daughter with her horse. As a life long rider I can’t even begin to tell you what my horses mean to me and how they’ve changed my life. If buying your wondeful books goes to help a horse obsessed kid, well that’s icing on the cake!
You are a great mom.
I know all to well, you do what it takes to make your child’s life the best that it can be. For me, it was putting my son into hockey and being team mom. And of course he had to play goalie, the most costly to outfit. The skates alone were $300.00. And we had to buy new ones every year because he outgrew them every year. And for 8 years our vacations were to hockey tournaments all over the country. My son is now 25, and I miss it like you wouldn’t believe. It was worth every penny we spent to watch him deal with his ADHD and learn to focus and cope.
You do what you have to do Heidi, only you know how right it is. And if buying your books helps, I’ll gladly do my part as long as you keep writing such wonderful stories.
I always say: horses are special ‘people’. They are so in tune with their riders, they pick up on the littlest things and for some reason, the riders feel that to get the most out of their horses, they need to let go of everything. All this happens on a subconscious level. I know. I benefited from that as a young child too and I see my godson’s autistic sister benefit from it as well.
I hope you can find the money for the horse and for its care.
Wow! Love that story and totally understand. My daughter started taking lessons in trade for mucking stalls which was awesome and gave us a chance to see if she really wanted to do it before we went hog wild buying equipment. The riding barn she went to is part of our university here and they have a lot of donated/retired horses. She had so much fun! When the rules changed about trading lessons, we had to start paying, but by God we made it work! It was worth it. She learned so much about responsibility, friendship, caring for animals, etc. Good luck to you
It is totally worth it!! I’m 40-something and still riding. I’ve given up many things to keep riding. It’s my therapy – without riding lessons and my horse buddies, I’d be drinking. A lot. Good luck to your daughter, maybe I’ll see her at a show. Keep writing – I haven’t given up buying books.
Heidi H. you are my hero. Yes, absolutely yes to all this… and I get it. My Frankie is much the same, and when she was going to riding lessons she was so happy. Beautiful pic of your little liebling.
Go you! And I hope your daughter appreciates all of this now, and when she’s 14 and when she’s 18.
I started riding when I was 13, and when my mom lost her part-time gig (which was in addition to her full-time one) that paid for my lessons, I worked at the barn to pay the fees off. Used tack shops are wonderful
I’m not 13 any more, but I’m still riding (and still working at the barn, although now as an exercise rider, to pay off riding fees). Horses change lives…they make your heart big and your wallet small!
Good luck
My daughter took lessons until the barn she rode at turned up its toes. When she started college out in Colorado, I found a stable where she could get lessons and for two years she rode her bike five miles each direction in just about any weather to get there. This year she is a little too far away, a little too busy and a little too broke.
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My cousin and I were both horse-crazy as we grew up. My allergies allow me to be around horses all too rarely, but she has owned horses for many years now and passed on her love of them to both of her children. Yes – it’s worth the effort for that smile.
My life would be empty without my horses – I wish I had been around them more when I was a kid – congrats on making your little girls dreams a reality. You will look back one day a realize that it was worth every single penny <3